Hello everyone
Today is the last day of Week 2. make sure you have played your part by contributing and commenting on other people’s posts.
In case you are not on our WhatsApp group, let me share what is happening that side, the first person was responding to what I shared from the French e-discussion:
[03/03, 08:40] Ngwenya Denis: Very good write up here which brings out the issues as they are without sugar coating. I see a number of similarities between the communities in the Francophone region and ours here in the south of Sahara.
A notable similarity is the issue of the girl being compelled to recognise her younger brother as “brother”. It is the same here. A woman must recognise the role of the male sibling whether old or younger than her. The reason being that the male sibling has the power to preside over talks about his sister’s marriage but never vice versa. Because of that the boy child is always superior to the girl child even if the girl is 15 years older than the boy.
Another similarity is the issue of food. The “men” only food. In certain tribes here, women are expected to serve their husbands “certain” pieces of meat like chicken “thighs and backs” that are exclusively for men. It is a taboo for a woman to slaughter a chicken and allocate the “back” to herself. Doing such a thing is considered a serious act of misconduct and disrespect towards the “head” of the family
[03/03, 15:38] Sk Sonke G Justice: Dear all
Hope you are doing well
Always good to engage on this issue every time and again because transformation takes time. Most of people resist change because the have a fear of unknown. Religion and Culture contribute in gender in equalities because men an women have certain roles in this system E.g. in church settings, men sit together and women and children sit together on one side. Men always take leadership in church being Priests/ Pastor or and position of power in church. There are very few churches that promote gender equality even those churched are doing enough due to the pressure others. The bible itself promote or have wonderful stories about men. As Ruth Banda indicated, this makes men think the are the most superior than women. In terms culture, we all know that culture is important because it guides you but culture is also big problem when it come to gender equality, in fact I do believe that most of cultures promote or support men’s power in deferent ways. Let’s begin to do an introspection because most of Men they don’t even know that they are the perpetrator of GBV. They thing they are doing good thing as they follow the principle of their culture. Let’s begin to fight Gender Base Violence by being starting in our selves family, friends and beyond. Thank to those participating and looking forward to more engagement. Allutta Continua
[03/03, 18:09] +254 716 782807: As I always tell my listener! GBV is a fight for everyone in the society! Others think that there are specific people who should fight GBV while we are all called to fight! When we start from us then our family and friends as people who surround us we will achieve!
[03/03, 20:03] +265 996 96 18 11: To say the truth other churches are the one who like to say that , women have no choice and their role is to follow and obey their husband. So to this it shows as the power is with men not women. Thas why they like to say I am the head of this family. In the communities they also say that boys must not cry during the finals saying that only girls may cry . so l see that some of our culture and believes are making power to men and boys than women and girls. I think we have a lot to do on GBV through our programes inorder to achieve our goals.
[03/03, 20:10] Patel Zim In SA: True ,the fight for GBV is everywhere and i guess the number we have here is good to help in the fight aganist GBV ,Together we can speak up against GBV in our respective stations
[03/03, 20:13] Ruth Banda Radio Explorer: Coming to gender inequalities among women in Zambia we still have a long way to do because we believe men are leaders in everything and also the head of the family and the role of women and children is to follow what a man say and find themselves in kitchens, for a example in eastern part of Zambia Petauke district to be specific a make can not even make a bed in the morning because it is the responsibility of a women and coming to traditional and norms if you don’t perform certain things you’re regarded to very useless even among your fellow women at the end of the day a woman will feel that men are better people to lead.
[03/03, 20:18] Ruth Banda Radio Explorer: We also have a issue of Female Genital Mutilation not even ministers have come out to talk about the same thing for now it is regarded as normal but we forget that girls are traumatized mentally and physically
[03/03, 20:28] +254 759 732332: I think it’s becoming difficult for FGM to end because people in the society are not fully working together to end it,no matter the NGO’s are trying but you can find parents will hide till they would make sure that it is done to their children just because of negative beliefs, something which lead to early marriages ,and you can find that girls getting married earlier does not well understand the roles as wife ,and they will end up passing through violence
[03/03, 20:33] +254 759 732332: True, as they say Charity begins at home
[03/03, 20:39] +254 716 782807: In Kenya churches have come out to fight fgm. A big step has been taken. Only some few characters within some few communities ongoing with it but secretly. This is something I fight on microphone 
encouraging any victim or witness to report it. FGM is archaic! Torments the mind and lowers female dignity
[03/03, 20:57] Busi N: Good evening
I am following the discussion with interest. I noticed from last night that it got hotter especially with regards religion.
There is democracy in other countries and that means we can safely say we might be moving towards gender equality or 50/50 even if it is just on paper and not in practice. In this instance, it does not mean you do not acknowledge the head of a household. I am referring to the head of the household as someone who takes decision in that particular household. We may have households where both husband and wife share equal decision making positions and I will not refer to the household head as the breadwinner as there are instances where the husband may be in between jobs and only the wife is working. I am saying this to show that we have different scenarios, families that embrace equality and those that do not. This is also the case when it comes to religion. We have different kinds of religious beliefs, if we talk of christianity alone we have the tradional churches like your Roman Catholics or Methodist, and the pentecostal churches. These different kinds have their own set of rules or norms when it comes to men and women with the traditional churches more stricter than the pentecostal in terms of the role of women in church. I see in our discussion that there are countries that do not allow women to speak in church but in some countries you may find a pentecostal church that is led by a woman. Churches will always tell you there is no democracy when it comes to the things of God but even so women may be allowed to be part of leadership and be part of decision making in church even though they will make it clear that as a woman, your head is your husband.
With all this I feel like women never live their lives. As girls they are under their fathers authority and as married grown ups the husband becomes the father figure, in some homes, the wife needs the permission of the husband to go somewhere, she cannot just report that she is going. The good thing about the churches is they encourage husbands to love their wives and when you love something you value it. I believe it is the same religion that can play a bigger role in making sure men work together with women as partners rather than as oppressors.
Thank you to all who are sharing and our resource people like @Sk Sonke G Justice who shared the experiences in their countries.
[03/03, 21:07] +254 716 782807: I agree! Others churches are so strict that women roles are well outlined and that women can not perform certain activities but only support! I.e catholic church does not allow women (nuns) to pastors in parishes but nuns are free to head different departments without oppression. I have seen nuns heading big hospitals, Communication departments, Education etc. This creates a platform to include both gender for the service of the community and glory to God.
[03/03, 22:15] Ngwenya Denis: I need to be enlightened about this FGM thing coz in my country I haven’t heard it being performed. Even if it is done then it should be in a very small scale and probably performed in very remote areas.
I have heard that those who do it, their intention is to reduce a girl’s libido so that she does not cheat with other men in the absence of her husband when she marries. I’m reliable informed that when FGM is performed on the girl, the most “sensitive parts” are cut off making the girl disabled because she won’t have any feelings for a man. If it is true, I honestly think it’s a serious violation because one cannot perform such a thing on the woman alone.
To those who practice it, why don’t they perform a similar practice on men so that they also not cheat when they are away from their wives??
[03/03, 22:17] +254 716 782807: The last statement 
[03/03, 22:20] +254 716 782807: FGM is just because of few lazy people holding unto ancient culture that does not help in anything but only exposing girls to mutilation and cutting shot their great dreams
[03/03, 22:26] Esau2: In Tanzania it was mostly practiced in pastoral societies, eg maasai, kurya etc. As you said it’s true, it was believed by removing that organ it helps a woman to be loyal to her husband. Even if the man will be absent for years.
The government used a lot of effort to educate these societies and atleast most of them are educated now they’re no longer practicing such thing but there are few who still do secretly
[03/03, 22:28] +254 716 782807: And the few are the ones pulling the society back! So unfortunate
[03/03, 22:31] Esau2: Yes, example in the end of last year it was reported by government officials caught a woman who still practicing FGM to young girls
[03/03, 22:38] +254 716 782807: If those who perform are made to face the consequences and they do away with the practice then our girls will be safe. Just like alcohol~if the producers stop producing then the society stops consuming alcohol.
[03/03, 22:45] +260 97 7812468: Honestly speaking if you read through religion doctrine you will realize that women and girls holds an inferior position, and this has been from time in memorial. Speaking for some of us who are Christians you will realise that from the mosaic laws women have never been favoured. Somehow our African culture and religious practises speak similar language in terms of how men and womwn should behave or conduct themselves
[03/03, 22:46] Esau2: Yeah sure, and the good thing is almost everyone now is aware of the effects of FGM so it’s easy to fight against
[03/03, 22:48] Esau2: That’s true,but am not sure if there were no women’s who engaged in religious issues am sure they’re, but they’re not recognized, even in bible there are few to mention eg, ESTHER, JUDITH,
[03/03, 23:00] +260 97 7812468: True those outstanding women like Esther did great things but not much recognised women you compate with the men folks. Otherwise Esther was a very intelligent and gifted woman
[03/03, 23:15] Gideon Sarkodie Osei Adars Fm: Dear all,
The interplay between religion and culture in gender inequalities is very important. These two seems to compliment each other in most gender stereotyping, it thus, complicate people’s acceptance of the definition of gender thereof.
For instance, most African cultures do not give women leadership opportunities, and then, some religions assert this with doctrines that projects the man as head and the women as a tail!!
Most situations that provoke GBV emanates emanates from these beliefs.
Cultural norms that makes the relationship between men and women as that of “Commander and Servant”, are precursors to GBV.
[03/03, 23:42] Gideon Sarkodie Osei Adars Fm: Yes, @Busi N. I agree with you that, the “head of the family” assertion may not in all scenarios amount undermining women’s role. Some women are also heads of families in some jurisdictions.
In today’s economic climate, women play many roles in the bread and butter affairs of families. The problem however, is the fact that they are not recognized even if they play such roles.
In Ghana for example, there is an old saying that, “even if a woman buys a gun, it will still hang on the man’s shoulders”. This means that, even if a woman does it, the man should eventually be credited. It’s very popular stereotyping…
[03/03, 23:49] Gideon Sarkodie Osei Adars Fm: @AMkabili, I like you first paragraph. It is equally important that, girls are also raised to understand that, men are not supposed to be the sole breadwinners. Most of the negative masculinities we see are as a result of the belief that, it is the sole responsibility of the man to provide for the family. Naturally, when it happens, the men tends to demand so much respect to the detriment of the woman.
[03/04, 05:10] +260 97 2484043: 33bAs in all the churches of the saints, 34 the women should keep silence in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be subordinate, as even the law says. 35 If there is anything they desire to know, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in church. 36 What! Did the word of God originate with you, or are you the only ones it has reached? 1 Corinthians 14:33b-36;
This research seeks to interpret 1 Corinthians 14:33b-36 in relation to women participation in church leadership. In other denomination, there has been the contention as to whether or not women should be involved in church leadership. Majority of denominations involve women one way or the other but some, especially among the mission churches, still believe that the leadership of the church should not be made open to women, basing the doctrine on the 1 Corinthians 14:33b-36. The aim of this essay therefore is to examine the text with a view to assessing its relevance for women’s participation in church leadership with a focus on contemporary
[03/04, 06:32] +265 995 55 39 51: Men can’t cheat 
[03/04, 09:13] +254 759 732332: In Kenya especially in the community of mine mostly I see there is large number of women who go to church compared to men, thus I think women are more consider in religion than men
[03/04, 10:28] Joseph Pasme: Thanks people for this sharing we getting a lot of experience and knowledge.
Anyway following my two radio program which I have so far presented. Here are some of the major points which came out from different guests. (Majority where women):
Women has power/ potential to do anything that a man can do. They can construct a building, painting, plastering and can work on drainages. Women can can do potential business like men and women have an equal opportunity equal rights with men.
On the barriers: Number of women they don’t trust themselves, they don’t support each other. Opportunity can be found but they will not support each other.
They don’t value themselves
They don’t understand or knowing very well what gender equality is.
They also appreciated the theme for this year women’s cerebration which state that Gender Equality today for sustainable tomorrow. That men and women should work together, support each other for them to have better life tomorrow.
Number of of men they don’t support women to do something own their own will. No proper access to a plot or having her own farm land unless when the husband died she will be given a land in the name of children not really for herself.
Disappointment on social economical. They said that some women here in Petauke and Luangazi District are the disappointment to men because of Gold mine which is located in Msanzala constituency once have started going there most of them end up forgetting their husbands, children and stay in mine doing business and remarried. Number of men have lost marriage out of that in trying to support them.
And a lot children they have even stopped schooling, engaging themselves into early marriages which is a danger to the development of this national or sustainable tomorrow to be achieved.
Lastly men where asked to know well their women/ wives and then support them if we are to to achieve gender equality.
[03/04, 10:43] Patrick Mentor: Hello everybody,
This week’s topic has brought to light the fact that oppression of women is deeply rooted in both culture and religion. We all agree that this blatant oppression, this violation of women’s rights need to be addressed, and it needs to be addressed now. My take is that the majority of women oppressors and violators of women rights do it without knowing that they are perpetuating a human (women) right violation since culture and religion practice or promote them as normal.
As broadcasters, we have a very big role to play. We need to recognise that the demeaning of the women and girls’ folk happens because of different reasons. There are those who do it because everyone around them is doing it and there are those who are doing it because culture or religion demands that they act that way. Our strategy to end this evil should, therefore, be specifically targeted. We need different approaches to dealing with it. One of them is simply AWARENESS. As broadcasters, we need to have programmes that make our listeners aware of the different practices and behaviours that violate women’s and girls’ rights. When people are aware of what needs to be done, a good number of them will oblige.
Another strategy should be aimed at those who defend practices that demean women and girls and violate their rights. The latter is very important but more difficult. It is like fighting in a war, and nobody fights a war without some people getting hurt. Those who feel that they might lose something if the culture or religion changed in favour of women’s and girls’ rights, will fight to the very end to preserve the status quo. Are we ready to stand up to them? If ‘yes’ let us plan to start doing something to that end, beginning on this year’s Women’s Day. Thereafter, let us make everyday Women’s Day in our programming. Remember, it is not always supposed to be a fight or a war, some people simply need information, awareness.
[03/04, 11:02] Busi N: Morning everyone
Someone mentioned that in Zambia the older women counsel the new brides on how not question or argue with what the husband says - this is a cultural norm. When we talk of women oppressors, we must not think it is only men. The system has made it seem normal for the older women to live a certain way and pass that on to the younger generation.
Coming to religion, I agree there are churches that believe it is not right for a woman to wear trousers or use make up etc. I recently listened to the conversation of a foreign national man calling the wife he left back home, he was arranging for the wife to visit and in the conversation he was telling the wife she must be prepared for a make over, and telling her that he would like to see her dressed in a certain way, eg wearing leggings and shorts especially in his house and also be comfortable wearing trousers in public. The wife felt like the husband is a changed person and wants her to commit sin and thus blocked the calls for some time. All this shows, once a certain way of life is endorsed by superiors and adopted, it will take time to shift that mentality to those affected, in fact they will not even think it is oppression.
A lot needs to be done, not only focusing on new generation but educating the older ones as well who will view young women as disobedient if they share their feelings or views on things.
[03/04, 11:06] Busi N: Welcome to those who just joined us.
We are on the last day of Week 2. Week 1 was about introducing yourself and sharing your understanding of positive masculinities. This week we are looking at religious and cultural norms with regards masculinities and these are the questions we are trying to answer:
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What are the religious and cultural norms regarding men and women’s roles (household, community)?
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What are some stereotypes coming from these roles, and how can they be harmful to individuals and communities? (Try to emphasize men and boys)
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How can we advocate for men to be more involved in sharing (unpaid) care responsibilities more equally? (e.g. domestic duties including raising children from birth)
[03/04, 11:40] +254 759 732332: 
,also there are churches who doesn’t want women to plait their hairs ,they just want them to cut it shot and cover it.
[03/04, 11:58] Gideon Sarkodie Osei Adars Fm: The was a very revealing show.
As journalists, we bear the highest duty in breaking these barriers! We can put confidence in women.
One strategy is for us to project the works and initiatives of women who have been able to overcome stereotypes and are doing well in men dominated fields.
[03/04, 12:11] Gideon Sarkodie Osei Adars Fm: @Busi N, the first point is exciting to note. These older women who train the younger ones, try to pass on their generational cultural norms. Once upon a time, I encountered such a woman in one of my field visits to farmers. Her argument was that, women should restrict themselves to house chores and leave the economic aspects to the men. She added that, women have the tendency to become arrogant when they get rich, and in order to maintain sanity in ta marriage, women should restrict their economic activities so that they not surpass their husbands in income.
[03/04, 12:12] Busi N: It is what they know and the wisdom they acquired. They need to change their tune and train the younger ones on not letting money change them
